Screenshot: via The Big Lead
Everybody who has ever placed a bet on a football game has at least one âbad beatâ story.
Whether itâs a chaotic ending to a regular season Steelers-Chargers game where the Chargers managed to cover only because Pittsburgh wasnât awarded a touchdown as the final seconds ticked off the clock or a phantom holding call in the fourth quarter of Super Bowl XL negating what probably would have eventually been a go-ahead touchdown for the Seahawks, referees have dicked over millions of bettors somewhere along the way. The saving grace for most of us is that usually Bill Levyâs shitdickery only sets us back $25 or $50.
But imagine a zebraâs ineptitude being responsible for you missing out onâŠwait for itâŠone million dollars. Well, thatâs the hell that one Canadian woman is living through after a kickoff that was returned for a touchdown in a CFL game was called back on a bull shit âillegal blockâ penalty.
You see, kids, Karen Kuldys was the Safeway/Sobeys âTouchdown to Winâ contestant during Thursday nightâs game between the Toronto Argonauts and Winnipeg Blue Bombers. Kuldys was in line to win $1 million if there were two kickoffs returned for touchdowns during the game, something that before the game started would have seemed like a bigger long shot than Brian Bosworth winning an Oscar.
But when Winnipegâs Lirim Hajrullahu returned the opening kickoff 105 yards for a tuddy, there was one of those âHoly shit balls, this might actually happenâ moments in the Kuldys household. And wouldnât you know it, Torontoâs Martese Jackson did Karen a solid with just under six minutes left in the second quarter when he sprinted 99 yards for the second kickoff returned for a touchdown in the game.
It was truly a magical moment:
Hereâs the $1 million penalty that will haunt Karen forever. #Argos #Bombers #CFL pic.twitter.com/Djwxg0Acht
â Devin Heroux (@Devin_Heroux) July 14, 2017
Hereâs the longer version.
Well, except for the fact that it wasnât.
You may have noticed Winnipegâs Mike Millerâs feet get tangled up with a Toronto playerâs dogs at the 30-yard line, and the referees decided that that constituted an illegal block, negating the touchdown and dicking over Karen Kuldys in the process.
Kuldys told news outlets that she was âstunnedâ after the dog shit call, but it really hadnât sunk in because she didnât know the rules of the game as well as other people like her husband.
âThat should have been a touchdown,â Karenâs husband said. âI need to get in touch with the CFL. The guy was eight yards behind the guy running into the end zone. And the Bomber guy fell on his own. The league is going to say they made a bad call, but that doesnât bring us our one million dollars.â
Itâs not all bad news for Kuldys and her husband, as they did win a $25,000 entertainment system as a part of the same contest. But I think the majority of us know where theyâd like to shove that thingâŠ
h/t The Big Lead