Australian Man Brings Birthday Cards Laced With Anthrax To Cops But It Turns Out To Be Cocaine Instead

September 15, 2016

Well, then let’s party, I guess.

According to Vice, a Brisbane man recently brought two cards he received for his birthday to a local police station because he thought they were laced with anthrax, but it turns out the white substance was actually top notch snout candy.

Officers temporarily shut down the Boondall Police Station and dressed up in yellow hazmat suits as a precaution after the man brought in what he thought was the deadly white powder. They even brought out the yellow caution tape and blocked off everybody in a 50-yard radius.

They then tested the substance and determined that it was in fact cocaine that had been sent to the unnamed man from an address in the UK.

In a related story, what a waste of blow.

It’s not this guy’s work ethic that landed him in the clink: Wyoming Man Arrested For Going Door-To-Door To Sell Cocaine

Tommy Gimler is a stand-up comedian, musician, writer, emcee and all-around good guy. He has worked hundreds of stages across the country, including those at The Laugh Factory, The World Famous Comedy Store and dozens of Improvs.

Tommy has had the pleasure of emceeing events for amazing clients such as Budweiser, Mitsubishi, Chase, Discovery, Animal Planet in front of thousands of people at events like the Super Bowl, X Games, U.S. Open, Little League World Series.