We’re only a week or so into the new year, and your resolutions to eat healthier are about to go down the shitter. That’s because Taco Bell is introducing a taco-a-day subscription service.
It’s called the Taco Lover’s Pass, and it lets you order a crunchy taco, soft taco, spicy potato soft taco, Doritos Locos taco, or the supreme version of any of the above, every day for a full month via the chain’s app.
A press release says the pass “makes it easy to help consumers reach new heights of their fandom and unlocks a flurry of options that fit every lifestyle.”
It’ll set you back about $10 a month, but that fee doesn’t include the cost of the post-taco diarrheal medication you’ll need or the dry-cleaning fee for when you inevitably shit your pants after eating all that meaty, cheesy, beany gloriousness (or grossness, depending on your perspective).
Taco Bell is counting on this subscription service to pull itself out of a pandemic sales slump. After testing the program in Tucson, Arizona, it discovered that 20% percent of subscribers were new and attracted by the dangling of a daily taco, while 20% renewed their subscription for another 30 days when it expired. The reasoning behind the subscription service is that people who show up for their daily taco will also be tempted to order other menu items. (Admittedly, smart, because who only eats one taco?!)
We don’t know if these people have guts of steel or are just gluttons for punishment, but we definitely won’t be among those who think eating Taco Bell daily is in any way, shape, or form a wise idea. Run for the border – no, not that one – if you know what’s good for you!
Cover Photo: Taco Bell
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