Keystone Will Pay $10K to Put Your Dog on Their Can, About Time They Helped Pay the Rent

March 11, 2020

So, you have a fur baby. A pup that you love almost as much (or more than) your own children. Maybe you have a feisty border collie or a sassy shih tzu. No matter the breed, your dog has been mooching from you for long enough. You feed it, you bathe it, you give it water and a warm place to sleep (or half of a bed). Heck, you even clean up its excrement, all without that freeloader paying a single dime or doing anything worthwhile (besides being adorable and rolling around on the floor asking for tummy rubs) to earn their keep. Well, thanks to Keystone beer, not only can they earn their keep, but they can be a celebrity spokesdog as well.

Since everyone needs yet another cloyingly sweet, fruit-based beer that barely resembles the hops- and malt-based drink we love, Keystone is launching a new beer called Keylightful (likely their attempt at gaining entry into the bro-centric and highly coveted Naturdays market). This raspberry-lime-flavored concoction that looks more like soda than beer is launching with a dog-centric contest.

They’re calling it “The Search for Lil’ Breezy Keezy Contest.” Our assumption is that the aforementioned “Breezy Keezy” is the name of the dog whose mug will grace 30-racks guaranteed to be used in beer pong tournaments throughout the land. But, that’s not all. The winning pup owner also gets $10,000 bones to buy all the dog food, water bowls, and squeaky toys your dog could ever want.

To enter, all you need to do is post a photo of your beloved bowser along with a caption explaining why they deserve the prestigious honor. Make sure to add @keystoneofficial, #searchforlilkeezy, and #contest to the post. Otherwise, it will be the equivalent of barking into thin air.

In the meantime, enjoy these GIFs of pups we believe would be the perfect spokesdogs for any brand, especially a beer.