Photo: Screen Gems
Guess what, guys! It turns out women are more likely to have friends with benefits (FWB). Are we dreaming? How is this possible? Well, now is your chance to leave and nagging wife and finally get all the perks of a relationship (oral sex, sports stuff, more sex) with zero of the downfall (curfew, vegan nachos, caring). Nah, just kidding, you’re totally married for life. But we do have some thoughts on the where it comes from.
Seriously though, Dred did a study on bed buddies, or friends with benefits, and the things that make or break a little no-strings-attached loving. Of a thousand people surveyed, half were American and half European so we get to see the difference not only between men and women’s responses but also that of another culture.
What constitutes a friends with benefits situation? Who finds more romance in the sweaty sheets of fuck buddies? Where do they come from? And how the hell is Melania still with that monster? All this and more below. (Hint: The First Lady has her own bedroom.)
It Turns Out Women Are More Likely To Have Friends With Benefits
More erotic talk: There Was a Character Named Boner on ‘Growing Pains,’ And Nobody Is Going to Say Something But Us?
FWB
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57% of People Have Tried Having a Friend With Benefits
Of the 1000 people surveyed, more than half have tried a friends with benefits scenario. But the number currently going on based on that same group tells us it didn't quite work out.
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But What Does That Mean Exactly?
Does this mean I can finally get my wisdom teeth removed? Oh joy, we should have done this sooner! No, it's essentially people who are tired or don't have the time or capacity to handle dating, so they turn to someone they trust to carry out the perks of a relationship without the weighty or negative aspects.
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Close to One-Fifth of Americans Have One Now
And, big surprise, one-fourth of Europeans are currently rocking some friends with benefits. Although that seems like a generous portion, more people tend to steer towards the traditional relationship in the end.
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Nearly Half of FWB Function Like Traditional Relationships
That means going out for the occasional dinner and talking about work, past sex partners and, of course, having wild (likely unprotected) sex. And 58% of Americans say it's more convenient. We're honestly surprised it's not more.
Convenience is one of the biggest perks. Yet 66 percent of Europeans say it's not more convenient. I wonder how they're doing it over there.
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But People With an FWB Have a Higher Rate of Satisfaction Than Relationships
No shit. An arrangement set up purely for a stress-free good time where nobody feels alone? I'll be damned!
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52% of Men Say They Feel Emotionally & Romantically Attached
More than half of men admitted in survey that they were both emotionally attached to their FWB and felt the sex was romantic. Apparently there are more mama boy teet-suckers than we thought out there.
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But Only 44% of Women Say They're Emotionally Attached
Yet less than half of women responded the same way. Were they being honest? Women do have a tendency to sleep early on with men they don't see a future with, whereas hold out in a relationship. What do you think?
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And Our Ways of Initiating It Tend to Vary
The three top ways recorded include 1) mutual desire 2) alcohol 3) one friend suggesting and the other agreeing. If you ask us, all three are simultaneously involved.
One person suggests it, the other agrees, then the first person pretends it was mutual because of weighty insecurity, and alcohol almost always is the kicker at some point. Maybe some had too much to remember that part.
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So Basically It Works Until It Doesn't
Considering obesity is on the rise and sex drives are down, don't be surprised when it comes to a screeching halt.
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Or You Could Just Get Married Like Everyone Else
Because that's the real American way, taking the good with the bad and the ugly. Ah, love.