Bad Technique Sex Advice
Ok, thanks to the magazines like Cosmopolitan and a lot of self-proclaimed sex experts that need to come up with weird stuff in order to sell more, we have a lot of stupid, technique-related advice.
“I remember when I was 16-17 yo, a friend’s mom recommended that if you use a little cola or sprite up the sn***h before a gentleman friend comes around, it’d make him going down on you ‘better'”
This lady is crazy, who even drinks sprite?
“That most to all guys like the ol’ finger up the ass. It’s very unwelcome in most cases, especially if you don’t warn them.”
A ton of guys jumped up like scared cats thanks to this advice. Well, at least their girlfriends were entertained. While this might be sound advice for some guys, girls should first get the green light.
“Guys love the teeth.”
Just the thought of that makes the guys squirm like hearing nails on a chalkboard.
“A SHOELACE: Wrap it around the middle of his shaft once, so you have two long ends. Then … pull on the strings, flossing it up and down.”
Oh, Cosmo… There is a theory that they purposely put out bad sex advice because if women were in happy relationships they wouldn’t have to buy the magazine.
“Cosmo: Find the seam on his balls and give them a pinch, it will make his orgasm that much more mind blowing. My ex-girlfriend tried this on me, it made me cry.”
Conspiracy theory proven.
“Twist the head.”
What? WHAT?! Nope, nope, nope. Easy there Satan.
“If that shit don’t sound like a fat chick running in flip flops that don’t fit, you ain’t doin’ it right”
Weeeell…
“Sprinkle a little pepper under his nose right before he climaxes. Sneezing can feel similar to an orgasm and amplify the feel-good effects.”
Cosmo strikes again, and it has undone itself with this one. Although it might work on Jamie Oliver.
“Grab her by the pussy”
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You can check additional bad consultations on Reddit, but remember, these are instances of bad sex advice, don’t think “Well, that doesn’t sound that bad”. And hey, maybe you’re already having great sex. If you ever got really bad sex advice, write it in the comments.
