“Vintage memory making.” Photo: PeopleImages (Getty).
I love reading articles about cool new technology. There is an almost endless supply of news stories about the newest/hottest thing to come out, but sometimes those articles hit on something that makes absolutely no sense. I mean, there is a difference between practical technology and technology that is for people to waste money on. Take, for example, your cell phone. Sure, you might have wasted some money getting the newest model or whatever, but it’s very practical because it can replace so many other devices that you would otherwise probably have to buy.
So when browsing one of those “100 Cool Tech Products of 2017″ articles, it got me thinking that someone needs to call some of these people out on their crap. Here are the 8 dumbest tech gadgets I could find on these lists:
The Dumbest Tech Gadgets Of 2017
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Dumbest Tech Gadgets 2017
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1. Sony Walkman NW-ZX100 MP3 Player
Like I was saying, your phone and Spotify totally replace this technology! Does anyone reading this want to carry around a phone AND an MP3 player? But the icing on the cake is the price for this dated technology. It retails for a whopping $698! Seriously Sony, I'm totally available to work in whatever department is in charge of nixing ideas like this. If anyone can think of a good reason to spend $700 on an MP3 player, hit me up on Twitter and let me know. I can't think of a single one.
Photo: Amazon
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2. Sony Playstation VR
Alright Sony, get it together. VR is pretty sweet, and as the technology progresses it's only going to get better, but for $400 I think I'll pass on the motion sickness and headaches this will induce. Hell, I could almost have a nice MP3 player for that kind of money! I'll give them some credit since this price is cheaper than other VR headsets, but I'm going to wait for the gaming market to catch up. Plus, as of right now, there is no way to not look like an asshole wearing a VR headset. Do it alone, or don't do it at all. That's my motto for a lot of things.
Photo: Amazon
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3. Philips Hue White Wireless Ambiance Lighting
This product claims that it has over 50,000 shades of white -- just like Utah. BOOM! Take that Utah! But seriously, you still have to screw them into a socket and then adjust them wirelessly, because as you know, most houses have all those damn electrical wires hanging all over the place. It's a cool idea, but if you know where your home's fuse box is and can use a screwdriver, you can install your own dimmer switch for one-tenth of the $150 price tag.
Photo: Amazon
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4. KEF LS50 Mini Monitors
If you work in the sound industry or your livelihood is tied to the audio industry, I can see someone spending $1,500 to get these computer speakers. But if you're like most people and use your computer for something other than mixing sound, why bother? You can get some amazing computer speakers for a lot cheaper. We've been making speakers for a long time, at some point the technology is going to advance past the point where our ears can tell a difference, right?
Photo: Amazon
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5. Impossible I-1 Instant Camera
Do you miss Polaroid cameras, and the smug feeling of having some sweet technology that makes life difficult? Then the I-1 is for you! It uses film made by the company, so keep your fingers crossed that they stay in business. Oh, you can also connect this camera to your phone. So when you're tired of using the better camera that is probably already in your phone, you can connect this turd to it to give your pictures that nice, douchey touch.
Photo: Amazon
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6. Onkyo DP-X1 MP3 Player
Seriously, am I missing something? Why are companies still making MP3 players that aren't phones? And also, why the hell are they so expensive? Whenever new technology comes out, the older technology is usually damn near given away. Are people really spending $700 on these things?
Photo: BestProducts.com
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7. LogiTech Harmony Elite
This universal remote can control over 200,000 devices. It has a sweet display. And is overpriced. I have a LogiTech universal remote at my house and it's wonderful, but for the money, I'd rather have a lot of other things. Oh, it also comes with an app that lets your phone control everything your overpriced remote can... so there's that.
Photo: BestProducts.com
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8. AmpliFi HD Router
This router looks awesome and high-tech. And if I had an extra $350 that I was either going to burn or flush down the toilet, I might consider using it to buy one. But in the end, it's just a router and most of us don't need a high-def display to let us know how shitty our internet is.
Photo: Amazon
