Well, then. It sounds like her god shops at Target.
According to The Smoking Gun, a 34-year-old South Carolina woman was arrested Monday night after police said she intentionally crashed her 2007 Ford Focus into a Camden Walmart.
Her reason for doing so? You guessed it: God told her to do it.
Authorities said surveillance video shows Crystal Marshall driving in the Walmart parking lot and then suddenly turning and plowing her car “directly into the building.” Officers who arrived on the scene noted that Marshall was “screaming and causing a disturbance” while telling everybody that “God told her to do it.”
Police didn’t buy it and booked Marshall on disorderly conduct and “malicious injury to real property” charges after her little stunt caused $1,000 in damages. They don’t believe Marshall was under the influence of alcohol, but it’s “unknown” if she was on some kind of drug.
Well for her sake, let’s hope she was.
Now we’ll have to wait and see if the same god who told her to ram her shitty car into the store will also show up to bail her out of jail.
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