Is The Cheesecake Factory Menu Too Long?

If you’ve ever eaten at the Cheesecake Factory, one of the first things you probably noticed, besides delicious foods and large portions at a reasonable price, is that the menu is insanely long. It’s seriously a book. As you flip through page after page it’s easy to get overwhelmed by the whole situation and miss out on a great dish just because there’s so much listed in the menu. So is it possible that the Cheesecake Factory menu is indeed too long?

I went through their menu during a recent visit and honestly I feel like some of the pages could be cut out with no real consequences whatsoever.

Let’s start with the eggs and omelets page:

Do we really need an ENTIRE PAGE dedicated to various styles of eggs? This could be cut down to just a few options and no one would complain at all. It’s just way too many eggs.

Did you know the Cheesecake Factory has pizza?

Of course not, because no one goes to the Cheesecake Factory to eat a pizza. It’s a very disposable list of items that takes up half a page for no real reason. You could add a few more lunch specials in place of the pizzas and honestly that would make the menu a little more manageable.

The “other snacks” page seems to be a complete cluster of random items that have no business even being on the menu to start with. Some of them aren’t even edible. Next to it is a page that lists drinks, which is understandable, but they’re listed with a bunch of pro wrestlers. Why? I thought it might be foods named after those wrestlers, but it’s not. They just include that list in there because they like wrestling. It’s baffling.

If you flip toward the back of the menu there’s a page that certainly stands out as unnecessary. The “misc items for sale” page seems to just be their version of Craigslist with classified ads listed. Is anyone really visiting the Cheesecake Factory with these things in mind? Next to that was a drawing of Shrek that someone apparently sketched. I didn’t mind that part and thought it was a refreshing change of pace. Kudos for that one, Cheesecake Factory.

Everyone usually goes straight to the back of the menu to look at the list of cheesecakes, but if you check two pages before the desserts there’s this bizarre page that just lists the 1992 U.S. Olympic basketball team. I’ve always been a fan of that team, but it has very little to do with the Cheesecake Factory brand. Next to that is the complete set of lyrics to “MMMBop” by Hanson. I thought maybe there was going to be a karaoke hour or something, but it never happened. This seems like a page they could probably do without.

Maybe I’m wrong and just need less options when dining out, but it certainly seems like they could save a lot of time and energy by cutting down on eggs, pizzas and lyrics to hit songs from the ’90s. Of course I’m no successful restaurant owner like Mr. Factory, so if it ain’t broke, why fix it?

Or it can always take this route: Check Out This Menu From A 1912 London Brothel (NSFW Language)

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