Pooping at work is a lot like listening to 5 Seconds of Summer in that nobody really enjoys doing it.
But according to BroBible, a 27-year-old dude who admits that he’s made some rather iffy life decisions that have put him in the current situation of being the “secretary for an entire office,” recently told the Reddit community that his attempts at keeping the handicapped crapper at his office all to himself eventually cost his company $250,000.
Here’s how his embarrassing story played out:
“Now, I don’t know about you guys, but nothing ruins my bathroom experience faster than sharing it with others. That won’t do, and there are like 4 other bathrooms.
So I discovered that I can lock the stall door beside me from the outside, rendering it inaccessible to anyone without this expert toilet stall knowledge. This was my apple dropping on head moment. This discovery was every bit as major as gravity. I could now shit and be confident I wouldn’t have to listen to somebody butt-trumpeting 24 inches away.
Things were good. For a time. There would be days where I would forget to unlock it. People would get annoyed, and they’d tell that guy who looks after this sort of thing to do something about it (guess who that guy is…)
After a summer of this, a rumor started. A rumour that the handicap stall was always broken. A rumor that was my fault, and literally my very job to share with important people. ‘hey shoob88 you tell HO about that problem yet?’
So I gave it up. But it was too late.
Today a procession of designers and engineers entered our office to begin designs on the new dedicated handicap stall. Because ours was always broken. We had failed one too many building inspections because of my habit.
Each bathroom will cost $80,000 and each floor will be getting one. It’s 100% my fault.”
Tough break, bro. Although, if they turn this story into a movie, we could totally see this as Jonathan Taylor Thomas’s comeback masterpiece.
Imagine if this is how humans pooped: Watch This A**hole Owl Poop On Another Owl
