You would think that protecting the environment would begin with the simple task of using the restroom when you have to take a dump.
But according to Government Executive, an email was sent to employees at the EPA’s regional office in Denver recently, asking them to stop using the hallways as toilets.
Deputy Regional Administrator Howard Cantor mentioned in the email that the EPA was talking with a workplace violence expert after several disturbing incidents, including the clogging of several toilets with paper towels and, of course, human fecal matter being found in a hallway.
National workplace violence “expert” John Nicoletti told the EPA that “poop in the hallway at work was a health and safety risk.” He also warned the perps who were dropping deuces in the hallway that any further incidents would “probably escalate their actions.”
While the obvious question is why in the hell somebody is using a hallway at the EPA as a toilet, we’d like to ask why the EPA was dropping cash on bringing in an expert to tell them pooping in the hallways was a health risk when they probably could have hired a kindergarten student to tell them the same thing at a much cheaper rate.
If the EPA was headquartered in India, then this story would have made more sense: Mr. Poo Aims to Get People in India to Stop Pooping in Public