Some audiences treat movies like they’re rides. You pay for the ticket, you pay way too much for food, and you sit down and experience crazy, unbelievable and awesome things unfold on screen in front of you.
So it makes perfect sense that a movie like Jurassic World is set to become one of the highest grossing movies in history. Colin Trevorrow’s film takes audiences on a ride that is, in itself, filled with awesome rides. Who cares if they all break down and the attractions start killing everybody? The people on the real ride – in the movie theater instead of the fictional park – are safe and sound and having the time of their lives, living vicariously through the characters in Jurassic World while safely judging them from afar.
Related: A Lot of Pieces: Colin Trevorrow On the Influences of ‘Jurassic World’
Jurassic World wasn’t the first film to benefit from creating a fictional, awesome amusement park. Even Jurassic Park can’t hold that title. The inherent entertainment value of creating a fictional theme park that could not exist in reality is a fantastic storytelling device for entertainers in a variety of genres, including sci-fi, animation and horror.
So we here at CraveOnline thought we’d scour our brains and share with you the best fictional movie theme parks we’ve ever seen. If they were real, we’d totally go, but in some cases we’re probably better off without them. The death toll would be enormous, and the insurance rates would be staggering.
Five Thrilling Theme Parks That Only Exist in Movies:
William Bibbiani is the editor of CraveOnline’s Film Channel and the host of The B-Movies Podcast. Follow him on Twitter at @WilliamBibbiani.
Five Thrilling Theme Parks That Only Exist in Movies
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Pleasure Island
From: Pinocchio (1940)
Hey kids, do you like smoking? How about gambling and booze? Then you'll love Pleasure Island, the magical getaway found only in Walt Disney's animated classic Pinocchio. The mysterious theme park caters only to the most prurient interests of young young wayward boys, and the only downside is that it turns you into a total ass - literally - and punishes your irresponsible behavior by forcing you into manual labor for the rest of your life.
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Delos
From: Westworld (1973)
Before he created Jurassic Park, author Michael Crichton envisioned another faulty futuristic tourist destination called Delos. On Delos, you can live out your historical fantasies on Westworld, Medeival World and Roman World with realistic androids designed to give you the perfect vacation experience. Wanna have sex with them? Go right ahead! Wanna kill them? You can do that too... unless they go haywire, because then they'll try to kill you right back.
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Price Amusements
From: House on Haunted Hill (1999)
The surprisingly fun remake of William Castle's classic House on Haunted Hill gave us a new and highly lucrative delivery system for terror: Price Amusements. The chain of theme parks specializes in rides that look like they're broken, but are actually perfectly safe. There's a roller coaster that's just for show: the real ride is the elevator that breaks on the way up to the top. Then there's a ride that looks like kills everyone in front of you, and makes it look like you're next. Just take our money, Mr. Price.
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Spooky Island
From: Scooby-Doo (2002)
The mostly awful live-action Scooby-Doo movie still boasts an alluring tourist trap: Spooky Island, a garish haunted house theme park with impressively over-designed rides. This place was so hip they were able to book Sugar Ray to perform by the pool, back when that actually meant something. If Shaggy and Scooby weren't wasting our time with a farting contest, Spooky Island would be a hell of a fun place to visit.
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Jurassic World
From: Jurassic World (2015)
Everyone always talks about what goes wrong at Jurassic Park. But what about the thousands of visitors who DIDN'T die? In Colin Trevorrow's sequel, Jurassic World was open for years without incident, and boasted incredible attractions that would have been worth just about any price. Mosasaurus shows, giant hamster ball tours... you name it, and Jurassic World had it. And it would have been the coolest amusement park ever.
Until, you know... "the incident."
