The Series Project: Herbie (Part 2)

The Love Bug (dir. Peyton Reed, 1997)

Sold as an ostensible made-for-TV remake of the 1968 original, this 1997 version of The Love Bug is actually a direct sequel to the previous movies. Dean Jones once again appears, looking dapper in his old age, to reprise his role of Jim Douglas for the final time, keeping this movie in line with the previous ones. Although possessed of a much, much smaller budget than any of the previous films (boy oh boy does this film ever look made-for-TV), there is a simple charm to The Love Bug 1997 that was lacking from the last film. That doesn’t mean that it;s great or anything, but I did have a good time watching it. Again, I have to cite the notable cast in this regard.

The main character is Hank Cooper, played by the funny and devilishly handsome Bruce Campbell. Campbell has made a career of playing funny, pissy blowhards, and Hank is no different. Campbell may not always star in the best of films, and he’s not the best of actors, but he has an ineffable star quality that his many fans know well. In The Love Bug, he is saddled with some pretty dumb dialogue, but he always looks like he’s having fun. He’s also never been better looking than he was in this film. His sidekick character – the Buddy Hackett if you will – is played by notable supporting actor Kevin J. O’Connor. Hank’s boss is played by Clarence Williams III. The villain is played by snarky Scottish actor John Hannah, and Hannah’s henchman is played by comedian Dana Gould. Even Micky Dolenz shows up as a rich muckitymuck.

So Herbie has, as per usual, somehow fallen on tough times. I’m not exactly sure how people can lose track of a living intelligent car, but it seems to happen a lot to Herbie, tempting me to once again draw a parallel to Au Hazard Balthazar. I can assure you I am the only film writer to make the parallel between Herbie the Love Bug and a Robert Bresson movie. Herbie is eventually used as the grist in a fix-’em-up mechanics challenge entered into by Hank, a professional mechanic. Hank manages to get Herbie fixed up just enough for him to win a race-of-the-beaters, and their relationship is off. Much of this The Love Bug is similar to the previous The Love Bug in that an arrogant driver refuses to acknowledge that his car is alive and that it was doing much of the hard work. Herbie is also determined to reunite Hank with his recent ex-girlfriend Alex (Alexandra Wentworth), forcing them into romantic situations. Again I have to ask what Herbie gets from this matchmaking. I guess he’s just a nice li’l car.

Herbie’s life attracts the attention of Roddy (O’Connor) who makes sculptures out of car parts. Roddy will be the first to recognize that Herbie is alive. How do they know his name is Herbie? It turns out there’s a plaque on the inside of Herbie’s trunk declaring his year of birth and his name. This is the only bit of revisionism we’ll have in the Herbie movies, as Buddy Hackett named Herbie in the original; he didn’t get the name from a little plaque. Indeed, the most grating parts of this film all pertain to Herbie’s origin, which was initially led me to research the actual origins of a Volkswagen Beetle.

Prepare for the stupid: It turns out that the American military commissioned a German engineer to make a supercar for military purposes. The engineer, Dr. Stumpfel (Harold Gould, no relation to Dana) discovered that, by accidentally knocking a beloved portrait of his late wife into a vat of metal, he infused it with the life that made Herbie a Love Bug. Yup, just like the plastic in Child’s Play 3, the soul is held in the materials. I hate this origin story crap. Is it not interesting enough that Herbie is alive? Do you have to make his origin clear as well? I don’t need to know how Herbie came to life. The explanation from the original film was enough: If you love a thing, sometimes it absorbs the love, and becomes a being much like yourself. Easy. No, now we have picture frames being poured into metal vats making magical cars on a whim.

Which is where the film eventually goes. Dig this: John Hannah plays a cocky driver named Simon Moore who was seen selling Herbie at the film’s outset, hoping that the famed Jim Douglas car would help him win (I guess Herbie had been passing hands a lot in the last 15 years). Herbie lost the races because he hated Simon, and starts winning because he likes Hank. Simon eventually sees Herbie win, hires the original engineer, and forces him to tell Herbie’s secrets. We learn Herbie’s origin story in a flashback. Then Simon forces Dr. Stumpfel to make a living VW Bug for him. Only instead of a portrait of his dead wife, Simon throws in a portrait of himself (he is quite the egotist). The result? Horace the Hate Bug.

Yup, there is an evil devil Herbie in this movie, painted a glossy black, complete with “angry eyes” headlights, named Horace. Horace is like a dog as well, but a mean doberman trained to kill. It even growls. Horace is scary and dark. Horace will eventually, yes, murder Herbie in the streets! Yes, Herbie will be driving around the streets fleeing from Hank (Hank had a fit of meanness that Herbie found distasteful) when he runs into Horace, who smashes him so bad that he dies right in front of Hank! We get to see the light blink out of Herbie’s little eye. The characters will be so sad that they’ll actually have a funeral for Herbie, intending to inter him in hallowed ground. Is it me, or is this kind of stuff way too dark for a playful children’s film about a living VW Bug? Evil cars? Murder? Funerals? This is not edgy, guys. This is sad.

Luckily, before everyone can bury Herbie, Jim Douglas (Dean Jones) appears to help out. Dean Jones looks great, by the way. Jim declares that Herbie can be fixed, and our heroes spend a long night repairing him using all the original parts. Herbie is eventually okay again. I like how much of the film is devoted to Herbie, and not to obnoxious supporting characters and precocious kids.

Eventually there will be a big race (there always is), this time between Herbie and Horace on a closed road in the California mountains. Winner gets the loser’s car. This is a setup also taken from the original film, and one that will be repeated in the sixth and final film; an evil racer will try to win Herbie for the pleasure of dismantling him. During the final race, we see that Horace is not only evil, but can “frown” with its bumper, and can hurl grenades and shoot lasers. Herbie is eventually sliced in half (also like in the original film), only this time he is sliced lengthwise. Herbie still wins the race. Horace charges off a cliff, and is seemingly sucked into a pit of hellfire. I was kind of hoping that Horace would mellow out and become a friend.

Not very sophisticated, I still enjoyed The Love Bug 1997 for its low-fi charm, and its Herbie-centric thinking. A note to directors of TV movies: I know you have a low budget, and you’re probably working with cheap cameras, so to make your film more interesting from a visual perspective, you gotta clutter up the sets with odd designs and bizarre backgrounds. The Love Bug, like any average TV movie, looks and feels cheap and bland. It’s contrived, but it’s still kinda fun.

Herbie returns in eight years time with his final hurrah in the big-budget theatrical release…

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