7 Reasons Why Oscar the Grouch Is Depressed

March 5, 2012

Can you tell me how to get… some counseling? That’s the question Oscar the Grouch should be asking. This meme gets to the bottom of Oscar’s “grouchiness.” Though it seems like all his so-called friends have written him off as a lovable grump, there’s really a lot of darkness in Oscar’s foam soul. Here are 7 reasons why Oscar the Grouch is depressed.

‘Nam

The unspeakable horrors he saw with those ping-pong ball eyes.

Elmo

Is it because of all the rats and the diseases? Who can say?

Bums

Compared to some of the garbage, maybe Bum’s piss smells good?

Fur Color

It’s not easy being puke green.

The Budget

Hopefully someone will throw a pair away… into his specific trash can… someday.

Zoe

He’s got to move on.

Mr. Hooper

Every night’s another nightmare.

Geoffrey Golden is the Editor in Chief of The Devastator: The Quarterly Comedy Magazine For Humans! Background via.

Comedy Channel Contributor

Geoffrey Golden is a writer AND a fighter from West Hollywood, CA. He's the Editor in Chief of The Devastator, "The Quarterly Comedy Magazine For Humans," sold in bookstores across the country. Geoffrey has also written for a bunch of magically glamorous Hollywood movie studios and websites, including Fox, Warner Bros, CraveOnline, Cracked, Comedy.com, National Lampoon and Lionsgate. As for his fighting experience, Geoffrey has faced off for both the Marvel and Capcom teams, but thinks Ryu and Wolverine should bury the hatchet already.