Ana de Armas

Ana De Armas Fans Sue For Getting Duped Into Seeing ‘Yesterday’ After Actress Was Cut, Unsure What to Do With Their Raging Boners Now

We’re almost a month into 2022, but the new year is already provided strong evidence that internet fandom is a disease. Last week Universal was sued by fans of Ana de Armas in a federal class-action lawsuit for misleading advertising. According to the suit, the studio tricked fans into thinking she was in the 2019 film Yesterday by including her in the trailers when she’s not actually in the movie. You heard that right, these “fans” are suing Universal for leaving their everlasting boners for Armas on the cutting room floor.

Conor Woulfe, 38, of Maryland, and Peter Michael Rosza, 44, of California, claim that they each paid $3.99 to rent the movie on Amazon Prime, only to discover that Armas wasn’t in the final cut. The suit seeks to recoup in excess of $5 million on behalf of affected 40-something hard-ons everywhere. The Lawsuit claims that Universal was “unable to rely on the fame of the actors playing Jack Malik (Himesh Patel) or Ellie (Lilly James) to maximize ticket and moves sales and rentals. Defendant consequently used Ms. De Armas’ fame, radiance, and brilliance to promote the film by including her in scenes in the movie trailers advertising Yesterday”.

The complaint also alleges that the movie studio tricked customers even further by featuring a cut scene where the protagonist plays The Beatles song “Something”. It claims that the trailer similarly piggybacked off the popularity of the song to trick viewers into seeing the movie. This isn’t the first suit of this type, as a woman in 2011 similarly sued for the “deceptive” marketing of the Ryan Gosling film, Drive

All we know is that if these idiots win, this lawsuit has the potential to create a dangerous precedent. At best, it will undoubtedly bring filmmakers like Terrence Malick to the point of extreme poverty. At worst, the severed boners of Ana de Armas fans will indeed have their revenge.

Cover Photo: Universal Pictures
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