Only in Florida could a story this outrageous be real. Meet 25-year-old Nicholas Ruthenberg, who recently got married. Rather than celebrate his nuptials the old-fashioned way, with a ceremony and a reception, he packed as much action into the big day as possible – and very little of it was legal.
On an August day, he and his sweetheart were married by a clerk of Indian River County, Florida. Only hours later, he was discovered driving in the wrong direction on a surface street and crashed into an oncoming vehicle. Rather than hang out and make sure he and the other driver were OK, he fought his way through the wreckage and fled.
Officers were dispatched to the scene and soon found the runaway groom in a nearby building. That was when things really got weird. According to police, he was “acting very erratic and appeared as if he were under the influence of an unknown substance.” Then he started shouting, “‘All hail Donald Trump!’” despite being a registered Democrat. He also yelled “1771” at officers and “I got my X1 and X2!” We’re still stumped on what he was referencing there.
After Ruthenberg somehow produced two clean breathalyzer tests, officers requested a urine test. Ruthenberg complied, but before he could provide a sample, he dropped trou and inserted two fingers up his butt in full view of the cops. That’s when they handcuffed him.
We still don’t know what Ruthenberg was on (though authorities brought in a Drug Recognition Expert to determine that; their best guess was cocaine, crack, meth, or other amphetamines) but the toxicology report will soon reveal all when he appears for his arraignment hearing…at the same Vero Beach courthouse where he was married. How’s that for coming full circle?
Cover Photo: AleksandarGeorgiev (Getty Images)
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