Meanwhile in Texas: The State Is Inundated With Drunk Birds From Berries, Just Keep Them Away From Politics

By Christopher Osburn

Photo: Stephen Tripp (Getty Images)

Everyone likes to get a buzz on from time to time. We, as humans are lucky enough to have a ton of choices when it comes to altering our state of mind. We can imbibe a few beers, cocktails, glasses of whiskey (or other liquors), wine, smoke a joint, or enjoy an edible (hopefully not all at once). But birds don’t have it so lucky. First of all, they don’t have fingers which makes making booze difficult. Secondly, they have tiny little brains that can’t possibly grasp the concept anyway. Still, if you live in one Texas city, you might have noticed a large number of drunk birds flying around.

A species of bird is returning to North Texas for the season. While this act on its own wouldn’t be strange, it’s the birds’ actions that are leaving locals scratching their heads. That’s because many of the birds appear to be plastered.

That’s right, many birds are flying around Forth Worth, Texas that seem to be drunk as a skunk. But, they aren’t tipping back tipples of long-aged Scotch. No, they’re getting wasted the natural way, by eating fermented berries.

The birds, called cedar waxwings, always come back to Texas in the late winter, but this year they’ve been flying erratically and slamming into windows. According to Rachel Richter, an urban wildlife biologist with the Texas Department of Parks and Wildlife, eating berries itself isn’t strange. This is the most common food they eat. “Sometimes they eat berries that have fermented and are a little bit past their prime,” she told WFAA-TV.

It seems likely they just don’t realize they’re eating fermented berries. But, maybe, like us, they’ve already seen enough of 2021 to know it’s not any better than 2020 and they just want to get their drink on and forget about it for a while.

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Christopher Osburn
Christopher Osburn

Christopher Osburn is a freelance writer located in Rochester, NY. He writes primarily about food and drink and has had his work appear on Uproxx, Thrillist, Food & Wine, Paste, Maxim, Men's Journal and a handful of others.

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