Sensible American Not Liking Odds He’ll Have Any Friends Left After November Election

With the recent announcement that Kanye West is running for president in the 2020 election, a lot of young voters steeled themselves. Why? Because they could already see by the viral tweets that many of their friends were going to foolishly cast their ballots for the egotistical rapper just because they like his music — or admire his bravado.

“I know my friends and they think our elections are a big joke,” said Jackson Porter, a local man who wanted to vote for Bernie Sanders but has resigned himself to a Biden presidency in the interest of the greater good. “The dumb ones are going to vote for Trump because they think he can turn this country around and the rest of them are going to vote for Kanye because they think it’d be funny if he won.”

Porter, along with many other young people, is preparing for a mass unfriending spree on Facebook. “I can’t watch their asinine political rants fill up my feed for the next four months,” he said. “It’s taxing on my mental health. I can only argue with idiots for so long. I’ll do what I can do by voting for Biden and then I have to let it go.”

Porter stated it was unfortunate that in the midst of a pandemic, he had to cut ties with the few friends he still had, but he was hopeful for the future. “I’m going to volunteer virtually for the Biden campaign. Maybe I can meet some nice, level-headed new friends that way.”

Cover Photo: Hill Street Studios (Getty Images)

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