Mandatory Funniest Tweets to Wrap the Week: Quarantine Week 9 Edition

If not for the chicken scratches on our bedroom walls, how else would we know it’s time for this week’s funniest tweets? To commemorate another one in the can (and surviving the endless coronavirus isolation), we’ve got another funny collection for you. This week’s lockdown included the protesting gym nuts, the loss of Jerry Stiller and Jeffrey Epstein definitely not killing himself. As always, we’re here if you need us. Now, catch up on all the Twitter insanity here, then, of course, follow us on Twitter or our name isn’t @Mandatory.

Humans had a pretty good run.

— Seth Rogen (@Sethrogen) May 15, 2020

Little Rock, pushing through quarantine pic.twitter.com/KZRM1J0kaL

— Bunkie Perkins (@BunkiePerkins) May 15, 2020

Jeff Bezos is gonna be a trillionaire. I think he did that just to piss off his ex-wife. “You wanna leave me? Fine, enjoy only having billions!”

— Adam Hunter (@AdamComedian) May 15, 2020

Judges who rule against stay-at-home orders should have to recite their decisions from a crowded mall

— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) May 13, 2020

REAL men don’t need a MASK when we go to the store because we’re not SCARED. All we need is an ASSAULT RIFLE and maybe a ROCKET LAUNCHER in case the YOGURT tries anything STUPID

— Dan Amira (@DanAmira) May 13, 2020

https://twitter.com/solomongeorgio/status/1259331887002091525?s=20

Every day I count the trees in my yard and the number is never the same. Anyway I'm fine.

— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) May 15, 2020

The talk your dog has with you when he is over you being in the house all day everyday. pic.twitter.com/maoSojTjFz

— Matthew A. Cherry (@MatthewACherry) May 15, 2020

https://twitter.com/alexblagg/status/1261098725239173121?s=20

willy wonka: oh my god. i just had the best idea

oompa: what is it

willy wonka: ok so u know how we kill children

oompa: ya

willy wonka: what if we start making candy

— david (@_elvishpresley_) May 15, 2020

https://twitter.com/imchriskelly/status/1261140919652241409?s=20

Whoever wrote this in front of my house, I will find you. pic.twitter.com/jzWtqKATSb

— Rob Huebel (@robhuebel) May 14, 2020

https://twitter.com/abbycohenwl/status/1261031030628077568?s=20

https://twitter.com/Home_Halfway/status/1261022199525367811?s=20

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