It may be Friday, but it’s also Valentine’s Day, and nothing is sweeter or more diabetic than a funny tweet you can share with those you love. If you missed our last Tweets of the Week, you missed a botched Iowa caucus, the failed impeachment, points Democrat debates and Jeffrey Epstein definitely not killing himself, but this week we just need a laugh to go without refined sugar binge. Thank goodness we have this sweet tweet video to get us through! Now catch up on all the Twitter insanity here, then, of course, follow us on Twitter @Mandatory.
Moira Rose’s Last-Minute Valentine’s Day: A Guide For When You’re the Schittiest at Relationships (And Gifts)
The Original ‘Ninja Turtles’ Turns 30: Meet the Middle-Aged Millennial Ninja Turtles
Weird News 2.6.2020
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Anti-Vaxxer Charged After Throwing Menstrual Blood in Court, Perfect Example For Why You Should Vaccinate Your Kids
Get more weird courtroom news here.
Photo: Sacramento County Sheriff’s Office
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Dumpster Dive: Investigation Discovers Amazon Third-Party Sellers Who Repackage Actual Trash
Get more shady Amazon shopping news here.
Photo: Art-Of-Photo (Getty Images)
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Meanwhile in Florida: Woman ‘Accidentally’ Gifts Semi-Automatic Rifle at Baby Shower, Completely Blows Away Karen’s Baby Yoga Mat
Get more baby gun rights news here.
Photo: CREATISTA (Getty Images)
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Woman’s Butthole Is a Business Page, But Facebook Is the Real Asshole for Not Taking It Down
Get more Facebook (sucks) news here.
Photo: Buzzfeed
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Gene-Edited Baby Born in China, Vows World Domination Before Gender Reveal Party
Get more baby world domination news here.
Photo: John M Lund Photography Inc (Getty Images)
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Meanwhile in Florida: Naked Man Steals Car From Valet, Wasn’t Planning on Leather Seats
Get more weird naked grand theft auto news here.
Photo: Westend61 (Getty Images)
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Disservice Animal: Cleverly Disturbed Man Registers Beer as an Emotional Support Pet
Get more genius alcoholic dude news here.
Photo: Space_Cat (Getty Images)
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Minnie Mouse Lands First Punch in Vegas Disney Brawl, Bet You Didn’t See Her Comin’
Get more Disney fight club news here.
Photo: Matthew Sperzel / Contributor
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Meanwhile in Florida: Bus Evacuated After Teen Hot-Boxes It With Axe Body Spray, Coins New Term ‘Douchebus’
Get more cheap body spray news here.
Photo: InnerVisionPRO (Getty Images)
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Kentucky School Expels Girl Over Rainbow Birthday Cake and Matching Sweater, Then Gets Sued For Being Enormous Prick
Get more weird school bigotry news here.
Photo: Kimberly Alford (Facebook)
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Meanwhile in Florida: Mom Leaves Kids on Bus to Smoke Weed, Alternative Parenting Style Denied
Get more (bad) stoner mom news here.
Photo: Ed Freeman (Getty Images)
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Meanwhile in America: Dumbass Caught Robbing Bank After Ironic Social Media Post About Making It ‘Look Easy’
Get more get-rich-quick-then-go-to-prison news here.
Photo: Victoria Gnatiuk (Getty Images)
