Those who dream nightly of getting Donald Trump re-elected and destroying our world oceans with plastic are getting an early Grinch gift this year because they can do both with just one click of the button now. Besides Make America Great Again flags, koozies, hats, sweatshirts and hand grenades, the Trump/Pence gift shop offers a 10-pack of non-reusable red plastic straws for $15 (that’s $1.50 per straw) with the Trump name on it. While the rest of humanity makes extensive plastic recyclable efforts, the Trump train wants to take us back to the good old days when people didn’t know about plastic pollution, which is apparently as much of a witch hunt or old wives tale as climate change (good thing that’s not real either). Stay tuned for Trump AK-47s and other world-ending gag gifts as we grow closer to the 2020 election. (We’re not going to give you the link to click because while this may seem amusing, it’s actually a tragedy.)
Democrats Leave Debates With New (Unintended) Funny Campaign Slogans
Plastic Pollution Proves Sea Creatures Are Absolute Slobs We Assumed Them to Be
Cover Image: donaldjtrump.com
Weird News Listicle 7-25-2019
-
Weird Food Trends: Breatharians Are Living on Organic, Filtered Air
-
Some People Will Do Anything to Get Out of Work (Like Run Someone Over)
-
Kids Teach Alexa to Fart and Grandpa Can’t Get Enough of It
-
The FDA Approved A Shot That Makes Women Horny, Finally
-
Meanwhile in Florida: Man Breaks Into Wendy’s, Makes Himself Late-Night Snack
-
Research Suggests Your Smartphone is Literally Making You Horny
-
We’re Spending a Ton of Money Drunk Shopping Online
-
Man Survived as Bear Food for a Month by Drinking His Own Urine
-
People Are Wearing AirPods During Sex Because We Don’t Even Know
-
Uber Driver Caught Jerking (Off Behind) the Wheel, Predictably Pulls Sex Toy On Cops
-
Meanwhile in Florida: Man Throws Feces At Judge, Jury Somehow Finds Him Not Guilty
-
Bill Cosby Teaches Prison Inmates About Being Role Models and Irony