Photo: Courtesy of Bubble Blaster
Screw this winter, right? Where’s the fun, sun, and Champagne?
To quote Bill Murray in Groundhog Day: “It’s gonna be cold, it’s gonna be gray, and it’s gonna last you for the rest of your life.” At least, it seems that way in dreary mid-February, but summer will be here before you know it. For us, that means beach, embarrassing sunburns and, of course, Champagne guns. You heard us. Champagne guns.
Bubbly Blaster is selling water guns that don’t shoot high-quality H20, oh no, they’re designed to shoot Champagne. Obviously, the most fun part about opening a bottle of Champagne is spraying suds everywhere, right? Like winning the World Series without ever having to run. Well, now you can do so with better aim.
You can preorder the Rosé Gold Bubbly Blaster for a quick $99, The “adult” Super Soaker attaches to a bottle of your favorite Champagne, turning it into a “long-lasting champers cannon.” While we believe that wasting great Champagne should be a punishable crime, we do love the idea of spraying things, in general, because that’s what guys do.
Check out our choices for the best Champagnes to drink, but if you’re planning to spray them at people, maybe buy a cheap bottle for that and save the good stuff for yourself. And when they’re lying, drenched, helpless on the ground, tell ’em Mandatory sent you.
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Champagne Bubbly Blaster
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Bollinger Special Cuvée
Bollinger is so baller that it’s the favorite Champagne brand of James Bond. When 007 isn’t drinking Martinis, he’s sipping on Bollinger. This Pinot Noir-based champagne is complex, bold, and pairs perfectly with cheese and secret agent-type business. It definitely doesn’t work well in a contraption designed to shoot Champagne.
Photo: Bollinger -
GH Mumm Grand Cordon Rosé
Mum’s the word when it comes to using this Champagne in a wine cannon. This brut rosé is refreshing, floral, and sweet. Made with Pinot Noir grapes, this sparkling wine definitely shouldn’t be misused by adding it to a Champagne blaster.
Photo: GH Mumm -
Moët Impérial Rosé
Moët is a big name in the world of Champagne. This rosé is juicy, effervescent, and full of tropical fruit flavors with subtle herbal finish. It’s perfect for a Champagne gun if you don’t mind paying $49 to spray your friends and family with sparkling wine that should be sipped slowly and enjoyed instead.
Photo: Moët -
Champagne Palmer & Co Brut Réserve
This brut Champagne was made using grapes from some of the most well-known and respected terroirs in the Champagne region. It’s rich, well-balaned, and luxurious with hints of citrus and pear and shouldn’t be used in a squirt gun for any reason at all.
Photo: Champagne Palmer & Co -
Veuve Clicquot Rich Rosé
This Champagne was inspired by mixology and was designed to be served over ice with berries or fruits added to it. It has myriad flavors including pineapple, citrus, and tropics fruits. At $65 dollars per 750ml bottles you should probably save this one for a special occasion instead of putting it into a Bubbly Blaster.
Photo: Veuve Clicquot