boy urinates outside

3-Year-Old Literally Urinates All Over Man’s Best-Laid Proposal Plans

young boy relieving himself. Photo: Alexander Nicholson (Getty)

Kids are a lot of work, which is why most parents refer to raising them as a full-time job. Children are unpredictable (almost wrote “unpeedictable” for reasons which will soon be apparent), so planning around them when you know they’ll be in your presence is tough. Impossible, really. Sadly, this applies to any major event where sitting quietly and keeping to themselves would be ideal. But when is life ever free from defect?

More of a visual learner? That’s no problem. We happen to know the perfect hypothetical scenario. Picture yourself (in this case, we’ll refer to you as Kevin Przytula) about to propose to your beautiful girlfriend (let’s call her Allyssa Anter) in front of the Ring of Friendship sculpture in Bay City, Michigan. You even brought your 11-year-old daughter Kayleigh along to video tape the whole thing in secret.

OK, while oddly specific, the mood is set… it’s go time.

Oh wait, just to throw the slightest wrench into the situation, imagine Allysa brought along her 3-year old son Owen, as well. No big deal.

You know what kids are also good for besides clearly stating “Imma pee outside” before doing it? Improving your patience to no end. The fact that your hypothetical girlfriend actually said “yes” should be proof of that.

Just imagine what they had to go through: 10 Kids Who Were Raised By Animals

Post-propissal, she also had to give kudos to her son Owen for the video going viral, as like it or not, he “stole the show.” But don’t worry, his potty training is still in the works.

Also, we’ll go ahead and drop the charade even though we totally had you going — this story really happened. We didn’t make it up and computer simulate the whole thing just to give you perspective.

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