Mature man kissing car. Photo: Westend61 (Getty)
You really can’t blame drunken sex with a car on drugs or alcohol. Most of us has been been either “drunk as shit” or “higher than a mofo” (or both), yet never attempted to make love to an automobile.
According to The Topeka Capital-Journal, a 24-year-old man in Newton will likely be charged with a “misdemeanor of lewd and lascivious behavior” after police officers found him trying to have sex with a car Tuesday night.
Police responded to a report of a naked man underneath a car. When they arrived, the sick bastard was sticking “his penis into the tailpipe of the vehicle.” He refused to listen to their calls to remove his hog from the exhaust, too. That’s when officers had no choice but to tase him. A hospital visit followed.
Officers said that on top of a .35 blood alcohol level, the kinky guy was likely on other drugs. The jail wouldn’t even hold him due to such a high intoxication level.
It’s unknown if the man is now aware of his actions, or if the owner of the car will look to get out of his lease early. I mean, I sure as hell wouldn’t want to take my kid to school in that thing anymore.
