Woman kissing a car. Photo: Zero Creatives (Getty)
There are gearheads, and then there’s this Pennsylvania woman and her sexual attraction to certain automobiles.
According to The Smoking Gun, police officers in West Norriton had no idea what they were about to encounter when responding to a call last month. They were told a woman was being chased down the street by two other women. Seems vague, but pretty routine thus far.
Here’s where things get…interesting. The reason the woman was running in and out of traffic was mechanophilia, a condition causing bizarre sexual desires towards machines such as bicycles, motor vehicles, helicopters, ships and airplanes.
The two women chasing the unnamed mechanophiliac wound up being health aides responsible for making sure she didn’t get outside and hump anything. They obviously failed miserably this time around. The aides and officers both caught up with the woman outside of a Marshalls in the heat of rush hour (Get it? In heat?). Imagine the equivalent of a college freshman seeing a lesbian orgy for the first time and you get an idea what they were up against.
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Clearly this wasn’t the first time the woman made a run for some car loving due to her sexual attraction. According to the police report, the health aides told police they were “not allowed to put their hands on her, so she runs off often.”
Officers eventually returned the woman to her house, where she immediately “kissed, hugged, and became emotional over a white Nissan Pathfinder that she called Husky Bear.” She apparently also yelled at another vehicle nearby, too, because she didn’t care for it. Just speculation, but we have to assume it was an El Camino.
