Photo: Corey Perrine/Getty Images
When the Phildelphia Eagles beat the Minnesota Vikings to advance to the Super Bowl people in Philly went completely nuts — so nuts that they took their celebration to the streets of Philadelphia and started climbing poles in the street. And remember these were poles that were covered in Crisco by police in order to prevent this. It didn’t work.
“The fact that we were greasing them doesn’t mean we were daring people to climb them,” Sgt. Eric Gripp, police spokesman said. “It’s the exact opposite.”
So while the Crisco obviously didn’t work, Police Commissioner Richard Ross said at a news conference that authorities were making “some small variations” this time. No word yet on what those “small variations are,” but everyone’s favorite porn site, Pornhub is chiming in and wants to help. How so? By offering a bunch of lube to slather on those poles. Sorry about the language.
Pornhub has offered 136 gallons – or “barrels of lube” – to Philly (see my story). This is the Super Bowl world we live in now. Move over Twin Peaks, Philly’s here. #FlyEaglesFly #GreasedPoles https://t.co/to3cCNScRV
— Stephanie Farr (@FarFarrAway) January 31, 2018
Chris Jackson, the communications director at Pornhub, revealed that the company is offering Philly 136 gallons of lubricant “to prohibit any tomfoolery after the game from Eagles fans.” That’s right, no tomfoolery. Jackson adds that Pornhub has “barrels of lube” at the ready should the city take the company up on its offer.
But let’s talk about how generous Pornhub is — not only do they provide us all with free videos of folks flopping around naked, but they help out people, too. Remember how Pornhub once helped a best man give a speech at a wedding? What about the time Pornhub gave everyone eight free nights of Pornhub Premium for the holidays? See, now that’s how you keep fans coming.
No word yet if Philly will accept the lube. There is also no word on whether it will be flavored or not.
Via Philly
