Photo: Ricardo Cortes-Cameron / EyeEm (Getty)
Kramer might have considered Ukraine to be weak and feeble, but based on what they’re sending people who order cheap sauna hats on Amazon, well, they seem to be anything but that.
According to Mashable, a journalist named Meagan Day jumped on Amazon late last year to order felt sauna hats from a seller known as RussianBear as a joke for her and her friends who like to use the sauna together. It took almost a month for Day to receive a package, but when she opened it, there was no sign of her hats. Instead, it was pretty much the exact opposite inside.
And just what is the exact opposite of felt sauna hats? You guessed it – blue scorpion venom.
No, seriously. Day shared her story on Twitter late last week.
BOY DO I HAVE A STORY FOR YOU. I tried to order some felt sauna hats that say “oligarch” on them from an Amazon seller named RussianBear, for me and my friends who like to sauna, like as a joke (though I actually really wanted one) pic.twitter.com/uRZGzTKVFx
— Meagan Day (@meaganmday) January 25, 2018
A month later I got a package from Ukraine containing only a contraband Cuban cancer drug made from blue scorpion venom. That’s it. That’s my story. pic.twitter.com/imGNv87nIF
— Meagan Day (@meaganmday) January 25, 2018
Breaking the news to my gf pic.twitter.com/xbov1avgk3
— Meagan Day (@meaganmday) January 26, 2018
Update: I was refunded for the oligarch hats without comment.
Also: The scorpion venom is apparently very valuable so if you have any ideas about how to capitalize on that situation in a legal way lmk thanks— Meagan Day (@meaganmday) January 27, 2018
Maybe it’s just us, but Day should probably send RussianBear a Christmas card, as blue scorpion venom is considered to be a miracle drug in Cuba when it comes to fighting cancer or restoring muscle and energy. And depending on how diluted the venom is, Day could be sitting on anything from a few hundred dollars to a few grand worth of the good shit.