A Store In Scotland Hired A Robot To Help Customers But He Scared The Hell Out Of Them Instead

Photo: CharlieAJA (Getty)

Robots are apparently “vague jerks” when they’re asked to work in supermarkets.

According to IFL Science, a robot named Fabio was recently developed at Heriot-Watt University in Scotland and then loaned to a Scottish supermarket to assist customers with general questions and sausage sampling.

The takeaway? You guessed it – robots suck balls at handing out sausage.

Fabio is “connected to the internet and any speech is processed elsewhere before a response is sent back, much like Siri or Alexa,” and the crew at Margiotta decided to hire him for their flagship store in Edinburgh after they programmed him with directions to hundreds of items in the store.

At first, Fabio was a huge hit with his “hello gorgeous” greeting and high-fives at the front door, but when it came time to actually help people find beer and cheese, he wound up being nothing short of a “vague” asshole.

“Where’s the beer?” one customer asked.

“In the alcohol section,” Fabio replied.

Um, yeah. No shit. Thanks, pal.

Fabio was then “demoted” to sausage sampling, but it appears as though Scottish consumers don’t want robots handling their meat. Fabio only managed to get two people to sample his sausage in a 15-mintue period, while a human being was able to get 12 people to eat the same meat over the same time period.

No word as to what’s next for Fabio, but it appears as though the coveted job of express lane bagger is out of the question for the time being.

Fabio’s cousin has been a much bigger success story: Science Has Finally Designed A Robot That Gives The Perfect Blow Job