If you’re one of those guys who thinks the only reason you haven’t taken home a beautiful young lady the last few Halloweens is because there were zero silicon vagina masks on the market, well, you’re in luck.
Sure, there was the brand that somehow didn’t notice they had vaginas all over their dress, and there are also accidental vaginas out there. But ladies and gentlemen, this is no accident.
According to Mirror, if you’ve got $480, then you’ve got enough to get a silicon vagina mask sculpted by Melissa Coulter that’s being sold right now on Etsy and can be shipped to any place on the planet. Even better news? You guessed it: There’s a picture of what you’ll look like as you make your way to the dance floor at McGillycuddy’s this Halloween. And boy, it’s NSFW.
Photo: Melissa Coulter (Etsy)
Here’s another look because you just need another angle:
Photo: Melissa Coulter (Etsy)
The bad news is that it looks as though there is only one silicon vagina mask available on Etsy right now, so if it’s your thing, you better come up with the 480 bucks fast before somebody else at the muffler shop decides to buy it.
And if that winds up being the case, no worries. There’s a company that is selling latex penis masks for less than 20 bucks, which isn’t much to pay to be a true dickhead this Halloween. Or you could skip buying the penis mask and just dress up like Martin Shkreli.
