Hey, some people get more excited about summer clearance sale items than others.
According to KOMO News, a 33-year-old woman stumbled into a Seattle family’s yard and “hiked up her dress and engaged in an intimate act with several lawn chairs.” And by “engaged in an intimate act,” Death and Taxes says they mean
she “humped” those lawn chairs.
Police said the “extremely intoxicated” woman wandered into the family’s yard on August 4 and gave their lawn chairs a reason to exist. She then pissed all over their lawn before “quite purposefully exposing her genitalia, and then posterior, to the family inside the home.”
Responding officers arrested the woman and charged her with indecent exposure because “her behavior was deemed serious enough to cause a person to reasonably experience fear, alarm or concern.”
It’s unclear whether or not the family has decided to unblock Cinemax from their kids after they watched a grown woman take their lawn furniture to pound town. I mean, let’s be honest. After watching that, what would be the point?
Hey, it apparently could have been much worse: Florida Man Had Sex With His Pit Bull in Front of His Neighbors
