Getting blackout drunk, taking down the fattest chick on campus and waking up in a puddle of each others’ vomit used to be considered a pretty bad night.
But odds are Brian McCurren would consider that an awesome adventure compared to what happened to him last weekend.
According to WSBT, the intoxicated 19-year-old University of Notre Dame student had an epic case of the munchies last Saturday night and broke into a local business named Therapeutic Indulgence, using a 100-pound flower pot to get through the front door.
But Therapeutic Indulgence is a spa, not a store that sells fine chocolates or pot brownies like its name suggests. So once he was inside, McCurren used a hammer to dig through drywall to get to a room that might actually have some grub.
The only room that fit the bill was the second-floor kitchen, where authorities say McCurren nuked half of a box of Hot Pockets in the microwave, cooked macaroni and cheese on the oven, and passed out on a table while eating Drumsticks.
Besides raiding the kitchen, McCurren was also responsible for thousands of dollars worth of damage after destroying lamps and furniture as well as spraying a fire extinguisher in four different rooms.
He has been charged with burglary, vandalism and underage drinking.
And if you’re wondering, the answer is yes, there is a pizza shop less than two blocks away, named Barnaby’s.
Hey, at least he didn’t have sex with the Hot Pockets: Dude Has Sex With Hot Pocket
