Head tattoos are among the lowest form of tattoo out there, perhaps only slightly less unsightly than neck tattoos. Tattoos above the collarbone are just not it. And we hope we can agree that man buns aren’t much better. Unfortunately, your boy Jason Momoa now has both.
The Aquaman star, whose calling card throughout his career has been his long, lustrous locks, recently shaved his head in an Instagram video. Maybe he got tired of taking care of all that hair. Maybe he wanted to save on shampoo. Maybe his head just got hot. Or maybe it was all a publicity stunt to promote his water company, Mananalu Water, which is on a mission to “unplastic our planet.” (Yup, that’s it. That’s the reason. Momoa is nothing if not a salesman.)
If you thought Momoa looked, well, different with the sides of his head shaved, just wait. It gets worse. Rather than let that precious hair grow back, he decided to decorate his dome by getting a tribal tattoo on the side of his head.
The 43-year-old actor debuted the look on Instagram in yet another sponsored post disguised as a casual video.
“Here we go @hawaiianairlines is back we’re going to New Zealand HAWAII TO AOTEROA Mahalo to my OHANA for being there for me yesterday @suluape_keone it was a true honor 20 years in the making,” the caption read. “So stoked @mananalu.water is on the flight mahalo again @hawaiianairlines help stop single use plastic. Always on the roam @soill Aloha j.”
Yeah, we didn’t understand any of that, either. Good thing a picture’s worth 1,000 words.
As if a tattoo on the side of one’s head wasn’t bad enough, he had the nerve to sport a bowler hat, too.
Momoa followed that shameless social media plug with a man bun in a subsequent post. (Dear gentlemen: Man buns are not a look. Please stop trying to make them happen.)
Maybe Momoa gets a pass in the hairstyle department because his tribal tattoo is actually meaningful instead of cultural appropriation, but he also might be taking his warrior reputation a little too seriously. Dude, you’re not actually a superhero; you just play one on the big screen.
Photo: David Livingston / Stringer (Getty Images)
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