Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt were spotted at the Pune, India airport on October 28th boarding a flight for a romantic getaway to Taj Lake Palace hotel, where Angelina was photographed wearing a shawl around her very loose fitting dress in sweltering heat. The picture shows what appears to be a pregnant belly.
When she got out of the car, she walked straight to the building, and she was messing around with the scarf, trying to cover herself with it,” the witness says. In fact, Star has learned that the actress, who wore similar baggy dresses and cover-ups early in her pregnancy with 5-month-old daughter Shiloh last winter, has been struggling over the last few weeks of shooting A Mighty Heart in Pune. “I heard she’s not able to hold down food very well,” a source tells Star. That’s not all: The source adds that Angelina is back on prenatal vitamins and she’s off birth control!”
Star is reporting this story, so we’re safe in assuming that all of these facts have been triple checked and the photos have not been altered in any way. Which is a good thing, because it means Brad Pitt is smart. There’s no way you can be in a relationship with Angelina Jolie and not try to constantly impregnate her. Or practice trying to impregnate her. It’s been scientifically proven. You could be asleep next to her and your penis and a wise Native American shaman would come to you in a vision telling you now is the time to fulfill your destiny.
Brad Pitt in India on November 1st:
Star cover thanks to Popbytes/Story source
angelina-jolie
Ridiculous Monsters 1
-
Killer Klowns
Movie: Killer Klowns from Outer Space (dir. Stephen Chiodo, 1988)
The 1980s were a magical time for off-the-wall bizarre monster flicks, and the decade saw films like Frankenhooker, Beetlejuice, TerrorVision, and The Toxic Avenger around every corner. One of the more notable monsters has to be the gaggle of aliens from Killer Klowns from Outer Space. The Klowns are a race of wrinkled and monstrous clown-shaped space aliens who arrive on Earth in a Big Top-shaped craft, and proceed to wrap human beings in cotton candy cocoons, in order to drink their caramelized innards with crazy straws. They are part funny and part terrifying, as clowns are pretty scary to begin with.
-
A Killer Lamp
Movie: Amityville 4: The Evil Escapes (dir. Sandor Stern, 1989)
The premise of the Amityville movies (which are still being made to this very day, and totaling about 13 by now) is that evil spirits living under a certain house in Long Island will cause the inhabitants to flip out an murder one another. In the fourth Amityville film, the evil spirits have infused all of the items in the house, and possessed knickknacks begin infiltrating other houses through insidious garage sales. In one of the sillier of monster movie conceits, all of the evil from Amityville ends up in a single floor lamp (just a lamp) that strangles people with its cord, and, uh... holds doors shut? It's not exactly the scariest thing you'll encounter.
-
The Death Bed
Movie: Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (dir. George Barry, 1977)
So someone is murdered on a bed hundreds of years ago, right? And the bed is them locked away in the basement of a castle, yeah? And then horny young teens break into the castle to have picnics and to have sex on the bed. Okay. I'm with you. Teens having sex on a possessed bed. Then the bed begins excreting a yellow acidic foam, and slurps up the horny teens into its, uh, stomach? And then spits out the bones? Yes, the bed eats people. Call me crazy, but stationary monsters aren't really all that scary. Especially if it's a bed. This film is long and lugubrious and dumb. And it has a bed that eats people. Yeesh.
-
Ro Man
Movie: Robot Monster (dir. Phil Tucker, 1953)
Ro-Man lives in a cave, seeking to destroy the last five people left on Earth after a robot holocaust. Somehow Ro-Man controls the entire planet with a few cardboard-looking computer machines. Ro-Man also looks suspiciously like an actor in a gorilla suit, but with a diving helmet for a head. Ro-Man secretly longs to “be like the hu-man. To live like the hu-man.” But also destroy the hu-mans. Ro-Man is so dumb-looking, Robot Monster is frequently seen on bottom-10 lists. I can really say nothing to defend this notorious turkey.
-
Hedorah
Movie: Godzilla vs. The Smog Monster (dir. Yoshimitsu Banno, 1971)
Godzilla fought all manner of bizarro creatures, from a giant lobster, to a giant moth, to a mechanized version of himself. Godzilla, while more a 9-year-old boy's fever dream than anything else, originally served as a metaphor for the dangers of The Bomb and lingering nuclear radiation following Hiroshima. As such, some of the Godzilla movies can tip into preachy territory. No film was preachier than 1971's Godzilla vs. The Smog Monster wherein Hedorah, a monster essentially built from pollution, was unleashed. Hedorah was goofy-looking and, uh, made of filth. Nothing draws us to the movies more quickly than a 100-foot pile of living garbage.
-
Guiron
Movie: Gamera vs. Guiron (dir. Noriaki Yuasa, 1969)
And while we're on the subject of kaiju, lets swivel our heads over to the lesser of the giant hero monsters, Gamera. Gamera was a giant flying turtle beast, star of a dozen films, who never achieved the popularity of Godzilla. Probably because of Gamera's totally bonkers rogues gallery of opponents, represented perhaps most iconically by Guiron, an extraterrestrial quadrupedal knife. Guiron had a knife for a head. It's head was a knife. Also, it had little ninja stars for ears, and could fling them with deadly accuracy. It was a giant living knife monster. No, it wasn't scary for a second. Gamera vs. Guiron was famously featured on “Mystery Science Theater 3000.”
-
Giant Killer Bunnies
Movie: Night of the Lepus (dir. William F. Claxton, 1972)
I do know a few people who find certain rodents to be utterly terrifying, and have seven seen someone recoil in horror from a rat. Some people even find famously cute little critters like bunnies and squirrels to be scary. Night of the Lepus, I suppose, was made for them. In an attempt to stave off the local rabbit population, an ambitious scientist injects experimental chemicals into a bunny, causing it to grow to the size of a Fiat, and reproduce quickly, creating a whole herd of giant mutant killer bloodthirsty bunny monsters. Well, they're giant in that the bunnies are larger than the miniature sets they're filmed against. Night of the Lepus is the cuddliest monster invasion you'll ever witness.
-
The Frankenstein Plant
Movie: The Revenge of Dr. X (dir. Unknown, 1970)
No one has seen this movie. I would doubt its very existence, were it not for some carefully unearthed production stills. In this film, a mad scientist uses electricity to imbue Venus Flytraps with a rudimentary animal intelligence, and give them a hunger for human flesh. The monster has Venus Flytraps for hands, and eats people, and has to remain planted in a pot. Like its two feet stick up out of the dirt. And it's really goofy-looking. Let me know if you can track down this movie.
-
Mr. Stay-Puft
Movie: Ghostbusters (dir. Ivan Reitman, 1984)
We all know about this guy, on the other hand. When an evil long-dead deity named Gozer returns to New York City after being dead for centuries, it offers humanity a choice: You will be destroyed, but you are allowed to choose the form of your destructor. Our wise-cracking ghostbusting heroes accidentally think up the most innocent thing they can think of: The cheerful, smiling mascot on the bag of Stay-Puft marshmallows. The result is a towering, giant marshmallow man the size of a building. Mr. Stay-Puft has become such a familiar pop culture image, it's easy to forget that a giant marshmallow man is wonderfully ridiculous.
-
The Golgothan
Movie: Dogma (dir. Kevin Smith, 1999)
Kevin Smith's playful analysis of his Catholic upbringing was presented less as a treatise on religious angst, and more like a comic book movie, featuring monsters, villains, heroes, and God as the ultimate arbiter of all superpowers. The film was irreverent to be sure, and Roman Catholics certainly took it on the chin, but Dogma was ultimately positive on most religious matters. In the film's most bizarre scene, however, our slacker heroes are beset by a Golgothan, which is essentially a demon made entirely of human excrement. Yes, it's a poop monster. The less said about it, perhaps the better.