Lindsay Lohan Hasn’t Called

According to the limousine driver who found Lindsay Lohan’s missing Hermes bag that was stuffed with $1 million worth of jewelry and her “asthma medicine” at Heathrow Airport earlier this month, he has not received the reward or the thank you note from Lindsay or her representatives that he was promised. The driver, Thomas Webster, says:

They haven’t gotten back to me. Not a word. She seems like a nice girl and she was pleased to get the bag back – it was full of diamonds and bracelets and necklaces. But it’s really disappointing. I’d like to hear from her with maybe just a ‘thanks very much.’ Her people took my address and phone number and said they’d be in touch. I know these stars need a good looking-after, but she could have easily just spoke to me on the phone.”

Lindsay’s publicist, Leslie Sloane Zelnik, who was recently fired by Britney Spears, seems really concerned about guy who found and returned $1 million that her client was stupid enough to lose.

I will look into that matter, but I wonder why they’d call a newspaper and not just call me. I think they obviously want free publicity using Lindsay’s name.”

Well, of course, because it’s obviously an evil plot to drag Lindsay Lohan’s good name through the mud. We all know that when she’s not reading the Bible to the sick and the elderly, she’s building houses for the poor. There’s only one Lindsay people, she can’t help the whole world. Yet for all the goodness and sunshine she brings to the world, people still continue to persecute her and fabricrate vicious lies about her. The world can be so cruel.

Lindsay at the Marie Antoinette Special Screening on September 26th:

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