When a friend of Brad Pitt’s found a vial of gray powder in the glove compartment of Pitt’s car, Brad said it was a gift from Angelina Jolie. Inside the vial was “the remnants of a bat” which Angie told Brad was “to ward of accidents.” Now a voodoo expert is explaining this is a method of Black Magic used to cast spells to break up relationships and marriages.
Doctor Snake, the author of cult best-seller “Voodoo Spellbook”, thinks that Jolie is working voodoo on Brad. “That vial sounds suspiciously like a voodoo ‘mojo hand’, or magical charm”, he says. Snake is skeptical that the charm is for warding off accidents, as voodoo spells using ingredients from bats are normally used in workings of black magic. “One dark voodoo spell uses Bat’s Heart Incense, which is burnt to break up a love affair or marriage”, the Doctor says. Isn’t that wicked? Doctor Snake has also made a prediction: the couple will be having twins.”
I’m glad Doctor Snake cleared this up. The method I’ve been using to break up Brad and Angie so I can make my move on Angie is all wrong. It turns out mailing pictures of naked butts with arrows pointing to them and the word “YOU” written on them to Brad Pitt is not going to break them up. However, there is no Black Magic which could ever make me step foot on one of these planes Angie and Brad were flying this weekend. These are the types of planes which end up stuck in the side of mountains or at the bottom of oceans. I like the ocean, I just don’t want to be chummed in it.
