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It’s undeniably cool that a proud white-trash guy like Johnny Knoxville would leave a confused and scared princess like Lindsay Lohan alone on the curb in a town like New Orleans, where the odds were 50-50 that she’d be kidnapped and sold into slavery. Although, if she was, it would end up like some John Hughes movie where she’s such a pain in the ass, the kidnappers end up paying a ransom to get rid of her. Hijinks would ensue and guys would get hit in the balls a lot. And in the end, we’d all learn a little about ourselves and a lot about love. Rated PG-13.