After a bit of rain, a bunch of rich, drunk people finally witnessed the ‘fastest two minutes in sports’ on Saturday. Also known as the Kentucky Derby, a horse named Always Dreaming won the 143rd annual Louisville race.
Who cares? Well, a lot of people at least pretend to. Below are just a slice of the celebrities and athletes who attended the race, and more importantly, a look at the ridiculous, pretentious garb they wore to the even more turgid event.
Enjoy. It’s a hoot.
Josh Helmuth is the editor of Crave Sports.
Kentucky Derby Celebs
A coach
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Avery Johnson attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
A Dallas Cowboy
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Tyron Smith attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Gustavo Caballero/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
A guy who races cars, not horses
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Rickie Fowler attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
A baller
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Tyler Ulis attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
More NBAers
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Skal Labissiere (L) attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
An actor and the TE for the Dallas Cowboys
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Josh Henderson and Jason Witten attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
A country music star and, OMG, that's a Boyz II Men member! Okay that's rad.
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Travis Tritt and Shawn Stockman attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Another race car driver
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Alexander Rossi attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
A 'goodfella'
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Dee Dee Sorvino and actor Paul Sorvino attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
A cute singer/actress
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Laura Bell Bundy attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Katie Couric
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Katie Couric attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Creator of Seinfeld
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Comedian Larry David attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Hot chef
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Giada De Laurentiis attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Gustavo Caballero/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Pro golfer and his lovely wife
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Kate Rose and Justin Rose attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Gustavo Caballero/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
New England Patriots
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Jimmy Garoppolo and Jacoby Brissett attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
A Bon Jovi rocker and a country rocker
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Richie Sambora and Eddie Montgomery attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Brady, Tom .... what's with the hat?
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Tom Brady on Kentucky Derby Day at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Douglas DeFelice/Eclipse Sportswire/Getty Images)
A musician. Like, a real one.
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Harry Connick Jr. sings the national anthem at the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Gustavo Caballero/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Hall-of-Fame NFLer and future HOF NFLer
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Jerry Rice and Jason Witten attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Kid Rock is classy
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Kid Rock, Julian Edelman, and Guy Fieri attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Kid Rock and a Guy
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Kid Rock and Guy Fieri attend the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Nicholas Hunt/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
Here's a shot of your real winner - Always Dreaming
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Always Dreaming #5 with John Velazquez aboard wins the Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Alex Evers/Eclipse Sportswire/Getty Images)
NSYNC
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Joey Fatone attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Gustavo Caballero/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)
And Brian friggin' McKnight ya'll!
LOUISVILLE, KY - MAY 06: Brian McKnight attends the 143rd Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs on May 6, 2017 in Louisville, Kentucky. (Photo by Gustavo Caballero/Getty Images for Churchill Downs)