Photos: AMC
Another season of bloodied bodies and zombies guts gone by, and now it’s time for some finale spoiler predictions for Rick, Negan and the rest of The Walking Dead. With Negan aware of Rick’s quiet running around trying to upset the established order he has not-so-delicately placed, we’re going to see some upsetting major predictions come to fruition at the end of season seven.
Our seven predictions for the season seven finale of The Walking Dead combine the culminating events from our favorite love/hate zombie relationship, including Negan’s hunt for Daryl after his escape, Rosita and Sasha’s race to their deaths, Rick’s constant inability to follow orders, Morgan’s psychotic break and indecision to fight or flee, Dwight’s disgusting two-faced…face, Carl just pissing us the fuck off and not dying and, of course, the triumphant return of Grembly-Gunk.
Walk with us down the zombie-ridden roads to the seven season finale of The Walking Dead with these killer predictions. You may not like what you’re about to read, but then again, it’s the internet so what did you expect? Join us for the finale, where we hope to finally see these “beachball-sized lady nuts” and that fucking tiger finally getting loose. Then hit us back with your thoughts on our predictions. The Walking Dead season seven finale airs Sunday, April 2 on AMC.
Our 7 Major Predictions for ‘The Walking Dead’ Season 7 Finale Will Blow Your Beachball-Sized Lady Nuts Right Off
For more predictions, try this now: Our Best 5 Guesses at Who Will Kill Negan on ‘The Walking Dead
TWD S7 Finale
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Carl Makes Us Want to Kill Him Some More
Photo: AMC
It's been seven seasons of us wanting Carl to die, and while he's been shot in the eye and still survived, we're almost certain he won't go away ever. Rick even said earlier this season that Carl and Enid are the future, which makes us hopeful that the creators will crush that future, but then again, Carl seems to stick around just to get an angry rise out of us.
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The Traitor Will Be Inside Rick's Walls
Photo: AMC
In the penultimate episode of season seven, it's revealed Negan is onto Rick's plan, but who tipped him off? Eugene may be a coward, but he wouldn't put his friends in danger. Dwight seems to have switched teams for the moment. George has Simon's address in case of a rouse but seems to not have used it yet. The only possibility lies in Rick's so-called new allies, either Jadis or someone from the kingdom, and based on the awkward exchange of left-handed shakes with Jadis, we're guessing she's our Judas. And how wicked would it be if they got behind Rick's walls as allies, only to turn. Either way, the finale will likely spill the zombie beans.
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Rosita Dies a Sexy, Badass Death (Along With...)
Photo: AMC
She already shot at Negan and hit Lucille, yet managed to survive, but Rosita has been walking on the ledge all season trying to kill Negan. We have a feeling someone major will die, probably multiple people from Rick's crew, but likely no original cast members. We believe Sasha and Rosita will both go, albeit it's a shame since Rosita is, by far, the sexiest girl on The Walking Dead. But we also have a hunch that Morgan's demons are back and that his story has been told. He'll be convinced to join the fight, only to die in it.
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Negan Uses Sasha to Flush Out Daryl
Photo: AMC
Negan made it clear he has designs for Sasha after she stormed his caves. Obviously he has no intentions of actually keeping her around, but instead of just throwing a wrench in Rick's plans for mutiny, we think Negan will use a woman to flush out Daryl, which people may have forgotten was at the top of his list. Is Daryl up next on the chopping block? Or can Sasha get herself killed first? Or, or, or...what if Negan returns Sasha to Rick, but as a zombie. Wouldn't that teach him some manners?
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Daryl Reconciles With Dwight
Photo: AMC
We saw in the preview that Daryl is ready to haul off and put an arrow through Dwight, but after a heart-to-heart chat in the cellar, we think Dwight will come clean and make amends with Daryl, who will no doubt sympathize. Or maybe he'll just kill the fucker already.
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Rick Finally Loses His Hand
Photo: AMC
The brutal season seven premiere topped off two deaths with a near chopping of Rick's hand. Upon his mighty failure to overthrow Negan by forming allies, we'll see Rick finally lose that hand, the one Negan spared before. Then we'll see who's a leader after this. It will, no doubt, come in the form of a brutal game where Rick has to make a big, ugly decision that ultimately gets somebody hurt.
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Negan Lives...And He's Never Been Meaner
Everybody has been waiting all season to see who will kill Negan, but folks, that just ain't going to happen. There's a lot of learning left to do with this complex man, a guy who seemed sinister to the bone at first but appears to be quite the leader. We like the idea of him converting Rick's team members over to his, and we like to see his vulnerabilities come out, along with a few surprises. In short, he's by far the best guest character the show has seen, and they would be stupid to kill him off so soon. What are they going to do when he's gone, go back to killing baby goats?