Michigan Man Was Masturbating To Porn On His Phone Before Fatal Crash

I’ve heard of people getting killed during a carjacking before, but this is just a tad different.

According to Fox 2 Detroit, a 58-year-old man literally masturbated to death early Sunday morning when he rolled his car while jerking off to porn on his cell phone.

Police said Clifford Ray Jones wasn’t wearing a seatbelt and was found partially ejected through the sunroof after he rolled his 1996 Toyota sometime before 3:30 a.m. Sunday morning on an I-75 ramp in Detroit.

He also wasn’t wearing any pants.

Michigan State Police Lieutenant Mike Shaw said it was one of the craziest things he had ever heard of.

“We see people putting on makeup,” Shaw said. “We see people doing different things as far as hygiene, as far as reading books. It’s almost to the fact there’s so much technology out there a lot of people are more paying attention to what they’re doing other than driving their cars.”

No word on what kind of porn Jones was bating to when he died, but if it couldn’t wait until he got home, then we’ll assume it was Mia Khalifa scissoring some other young starlet.

The mayo on my Whopper tastes funny: Florida Man Arrested For Masturbating Inside A Burger King

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