Thank God we live in an age in which penalizing late fees are (mostly) a thing of the past. Suck it, Blockbuster! In fact, ‘renting to own’ as a concept is all but dead-who wants to own anything now that a membership will allow for almost infinite and instant access to everything? But the days of the ridiculous rental-gone-wrongs aren’t so very far behind us. Let’s do a little learnin’ from the past.
Remember libraries? Buildings with a Barnes & Noble feel, but a musty smell rather than wafting Starbucks scents? Instead of cashiers they were run by bespectacled old bitties who wouldn’t let you pay for their books, unless you kept them longer than their two-week access period, in which case they charged you serious coin (as in, a fee that could be paid in actual coins). Well, this year the New York Public Library received a stupidly overdue book that raised a few eyebrows … A sex manual from 1926 called “Ideal Marriage,” due back to the NYPL in 1959, arrived in the mail with the following note:
“We found this book amongst my late brother-in-law’s things. The book didn’t support his efforts with his first (and only) marriage … it failed! No wonder he hid the book! So sorry!! ~ A shocked in-law”
“We found this book amongst my late brother-in-law’s things. The book didn’t support his efforts with his first (and only) marriage … it failed! No wonder he hid the book! So sorry!! ~ A shocked in-law”
This next story is baffling on so many levels. Let us count the startling facts that add up to ‘crazy’: A 27-year-old woman (#1) rented a VHS tape (#2) of JLo’s Razzie-nominated “Monster-in-Law” (#3), kept it for nine years past its return date (#4) and was subsequently arrested (#5) in 2014 (all remaining numbers). If your mind hasn’t yet been blown, consider this: The above did not happen in Florida. I KNOW.
One thing you might still consider renting in this day and age is a car, especially if you’re travelling. And if you’re paying to sit behind someone else’s wheel, it’s often worth the splurge to ensure you’re in command of a nice ride. So thought a woman we wish was named Sally (sadly she goes by ‘Jennifer’), who rented a cherry-red 2014 Mustang GT Convertible for a weekend. She returned the car to an Enterprise lot in Nova Scotia after office hours (but before it was due), and went about her business. Unfortunately for Sally Jennifer, car thieves swiped the Mustang before Enterprise opened the following morning. Since the car was technically in her name, Sally Jennifer received a bill for $47,271-the cost of a replacement. Apparently a sign on the key drop-box stated: “Vehicles returned after hours are the responsibility of the renter until inspected on the next business day.”
Ever consider saving some rent the next time you’re out of town by putting your place up on Airbnb? Think again. This past summer a Palm Springs woman put her one-bedroom condo on the site and rented it to a man and his brother for 30 days; the guys paid in full … but after the month was up, they refused to leave. Due to California housing laws, after 30 days a subletter technically becomes a tenant, and should an owner wish to evict a tenant a formal complaint, along with expensive lawyers and a three- to six-month process of rigmarole, becomes necessary. Knowing this, the squatters stayed, rent-free, for another full month, aware that the cost of legal proceedings would prohibit the owner from tossing them out. Slow clap, squatters.
